A high conflict divorce can leave you exhausted both financially and emotionally. It begins with one party doing everything legally possible to come out “the winner.” There are many disadvantages to divorcing this way, but there are times when it cannot be avoided.
Some Signs That the Divorce Will be High Conflict
There is a personality type that almost assures the divorce will be high conflict. Some signs are that one party:
- Is always blaming the other one.
- Is controlling and manipulative, both consciously and unconsciously.
- Has emotional outbursts of yelling and screaming and is difficult to control.
- Is unable to accept responsibility for their own role in the divorce.
- Has financial control over the other one.
- May have a mental health issue or personality disorder.
- Attempts to alienate the children from the other parent.
- Unable to compromise due to the “I must win” mindset.
- May have drug or alcohol abuse issues.
- Claims to have no income or low income all while living a middle-class lifestyle.
- Has hired a high-conflict attorney.
- A history of physical or emotional abuse against their partner.
- Lacks the capacity for introspection.
- Resists attempts to settle the divorce expeditiously.
The costs of the high conflict divorce are high, even though a normal divorce would not be.
Emotional and Financial Disadvantages of a High Conflict Divorce
Financial costs escalate. There will be a lot of text and email communications between the parties and the client and attorney. Each one results in attorney billable time to answer.
There are multiple court hearings since very few issues are resolved by agreement and child support, child custody and visitation, division of assets, who keeps the family home, and more, all require court hearings for resolution.
Emotional costs to you and your children. Children feel the strain of divorce no matter how amicable the process is. When they are part of a high conflict divorce, they often end up with poor self-esteem from feeling like they are part of the problem. They are concerned about what will happen to them and suffer long-term emotional stress when their parents are constantly in the midst of battle.
At Springer & Lyle We Have Experience Navigating Through a High Profile Divorce